Continental Divide

Its an interesting title for the news, today the CBC has themed its coverage of the US visit "the Continental Divide". I already posted some of my thoughts about this after the US election a few weeks ago but today I read an article in the Washington Post that better articulates the diverging values of the two countries. We're not as alike as you may think. Here's a snippet:

Longtime observers say the societies in Canada and the United States are drifting further apart in values and outlook even as their economies become more closely intertwined. Politically, they say, the two countries' populations are more estranged than at any time in recent memory, and Canadians are becoming increasingly critical of their southern neighbors.

"In 1981, only 8 percent of Canadians had an unfavorable view of the United States. Now 45 percent have an unfavorable view,'' said Michael Adams, a veteran pollster and philosophical proponent of the view that the two societies are diverging. "There has never been that kind of lopsided skew.''

The widening divide is evident in social issues. Canada's federal government is moving to decriminalize use of marijuana. Gay marriage is legal in three provinces, and gay partners of Canadian service members get spousal benefits. Abortion is considered a private issue.Capital punishment is banned. Religion is largely absent from politics.

Adams, the public-opinion expert, argues that his long-term polling shows a growing alienation between Canadians and Americans on suchbasic matters as their approaches to life, their attitudes toward government, religion and authority, their standards of living andtheir resolution of conflicts.

"The divergence is not at the elite level. It's in the social values that motivate people in their everyday life,'' said Adams, who laidout his findings in "Fire and Ice: The United States, Canada and the Myth of Converging Values.''

Those differences were exacerbated by the Iraq war and by the unilateralist streak in the Bush administration's foreign policy, said Reginald Stuart of Mount Saint Vincent University. "Canadians have an almost genetic instinct for multinationalism.''

SNOW!!!

I just got back from the only place in Vancouver that you can be guaranteed to see snow throughout the winter...Simon Fraser University. (Okay, okay, the only place besides the North Shore)

It was raining but as I started driving up the hill I saw a familar sight, cars were driving down the hill covered with snow, and then I got to the intersection of Gaglardi and University Drive and it was snowing!!! White stuff everywhere. I love snow!!

Preity, Rani and Shahrukh

Last night I went to see VEER-ZAARA with Bina and her friends at Raja Cinemas on Kingsway. This is remarkable because 1) I hadn't been to the theatre to see a hindi movie in years and 2) I haven't been out with my cousin since I was 16 (I've seen her but not gone out). It was great, a stereotypical hindi movie, romance, tragedy, songs and dance...not much violence, no dishoom dishoom, but all the other elements were there, including Shahrukh Khan (who is really beginning to grow on me). Very obvious was the more recent trend of using a film to make a political statement, especially with the recent attempts to improve the relationship between India/Pakistan, cricket, movies, politics. Its interesting to see how all facets of society are getting together to quell the turmoil. Maybe its just me, but I could have done without the "they say I'm not like him, but why does he look like me" speech, but I'm from Canada and not in the target group for the India and Pakistan aren't that different message, I already know that.

Anyway, I'm such a sap, I cried like a baby...twice, once before intermission and once after. I always get trapped in all the romantic crap.

The adventures of Captain Underpants

If you want to succeed at Trivial Pursuit - the 90s edition you must know all about Captain Underpants. Last night was games night, a chance for 16 or so twenty somethings to drink beer and bond while showing off our ability to recall random facts from the 90s. We had thought that since we all lived through the decade it would be a breeze. We were wrong, it was still TP after all and I was left wishing I had paid more attention to the news when I was twelve instead of chasing boys and getting into trouble with my friends.

We learned a little bit too much about eachother - like the time when someone screamed "I loved that show!!" after a question about Dr Quinn Medicine Woman, or when the group's knowledge of Mr Underpants was revealed. And there was that interesting geography lesson "Is Mexico in SOUTH America?", but all in all mixed up in all the intellectualism there were questions about 90210 and South Park so it was all in good fun.

In the end the best team won - Mine :) Made up of Jason, Raj, Sabur and myself, we came from behind with our knowledge of sports and politics to steal the thunder of the other teams. Here we are in deep concentration before the win:

And here are some of the losers:

Seriously though, it was one of the best times I've had since being back in Vancouver. Its nice when you actually get to talk to people instead of yelling over music and crowds. Plus I think it might have been the first time we all sat in the same room together, facing eachother for hours in a row and we all survived.

Dammit, I'm really going to miss it here.

My TV is being monopolized. I have lost all control. It all started when my brother purchased Need for Speed Underground 2 three days ago. He played for 4 hours straight tonight, I don't even think he ate dinner. I'm lucky I have alternatives.

Remember when we rented Bond 007 and an N64 and four controllers and stayed up for 48 hours straight to play it? (back then it was only available on the N64) Those were the days...

Above the sink

Overlap

Last month Avni said to me in a conversation "Each time you move to a new phase in your life, you can only take so many people with you". At a time when I was feeling uneasy about my lack of communication to many people who had play large roles during certain phases of my life, this phrase hit me and has stuck with me has I move on to the next.

Last night I met up with Adrian (my roommate, colleague, boss, friend from our time in Toronto), someone I've been happy to take with me to the next phase. He was visiting from Edmonton for the weekend for work and I picked him up after dinner and we went for a beer. It had been far too long since we'd see eachother/talked/caught up but after a playing catch up for a few minutes we settled in and just hung out, it was just like being at the Groundhog Pub around the corner or on the couch eating ice cream. Reminded me that a real friend is someone with whom you don't spend all your time reminiscing but instead you also talk about the future.

We decided that its probably time for another reunion. Plus we've all been crappy at updating lately, lets work on that. Once I'm out east and he's the last westerner standing, we should plan something. Seriously, how many people out there share our appreciation for Moosecock!! Its a bond that time will never break.

Reindeer playing monopoly?

1 Santa Claus Parade in Vancouver - FREE
4 Roundtrip 2-zone Skytrain fares - $16.00
5 Coffees from Starbucks to keep warm - $23.00
Waking up early on a Sunday morning to surprise Sejal with trip to see Santa - Priceless.

So this is what happens when a christmas crazed American marries and Canadian. We end up standing in the cold for hours just to see a fat man in a red jumpsuit go by in a sleigh. And believe me it was cold (hence the Wu-tang-esk pic below).

When Amar first told me that he wanted to go see the parade I thought he was joking. When I found out he wasn't, I relucantly agreed. I forgot what it was like to love christmas. We shared war stories about how we discovered that Santa wasn't real (In very hushed tones so that the kids around us wouldn't hear). We learned the differences between the Canadian and American version of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer (George Washington? Pinochio? Monopoly!?!?). We embarassed the boys by singing off tune christmas carols. We danced to the sounds of live bhangra music from the Indo-Canadian float and then watched the dragons of the Chinese community parade people. We even gave away all the flying candy that we caught to the little kids around us whose hands were too small to catch them. There was a moment when we thought Santa might not make it (I'm serious, people left), but after joining a little girl chanting "We want Santa!" there he came, around the corner, pulled by his reindeer and in the end, it was worth the wait :)

Just in case you've forgotten

Look, if you had one shot, one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted-One moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime

Once upon a time...

Today is my parents' thirty-seventh wedding anniversary, thats right 37 years!! I can't even imagine what they were like 37 years ago. I've heard the sappy stories, my dad thought my mom was totally beautiful right away but my mom was a bit unsure of this somewhat older man (although she too thought he was very handsome). He was 25 and she 18. My cousins and aunts always tell me little tidbits whenever they get the chance.

They married in Ginga, Uganda in 1967 and travelled to India for their honeymoon on a luxury cruise. My mom had only brought champals (sandals) and my dad had to carry her over the snow when they visited the himalayas. We have pictures of them in trendy clothes and sexy sunglasses in front of the Taj Mahal. We actually are lucky to have lots of pictures of their wedding and can you believe that there is even a spread of pics of their wedding bed all decorated with flower garlands. What was the photographer thinking? That in 37 years we'd enjoy looking at those pics? Its a page in the wedding album I'm happy to skip (right now my brother is thinking, did she have to mention that).

I know most kids would say this about their parents, but I can only hope to be as in love as my parents are after 35+ years of marriage. They are so adorable - from the way they make fun of eachother while doing the dishes, the way my dad still makes tea for my mom everyday, the silly arguments about why my mom goes to bed so late and then again about why she has trouble waking up in the morning. It might sound simple but when you've spent more of your lives together than apart, its all about the little things.

Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad!!

Domo arigato, Mr Roboto

This past week has been really interesting for me. A mesh of coversations from the past mixed with conversations about the future.

Its no secret that I want to settle down some time in the not too distant future. I have yet to decide when I want that future to start, just that I'm thinking about it. Me and Neil have said that 2007 is the year that it all will go down for both of us, but even that vague date seems to be slowly creeping up on me. I surprised myself on Saturday night by using the words "if you know anyone..." in a conversation with Kishori. Even she did a double take.

A comment made in passing, a question asked to a friend and a silly email exchange has really got me thinking about what I want in a mate. How important is religion, language, culture, origin, family, height, location? Now that I'm at a point when I'm actually receiving legitimate interests/requests I'm not sure what to say, or how to answer when questioned on my preferences. I don't really know what I want anymore, everytime I decide that some biodata-ish characteristic is important, I meet someone or have a conversation or epiphany that changes my mind and some other characteristic takes the lead. Am I willing to relocate (again)? Am I willing to live with the in-laws? How important is 'experience', in life or otherwise? Most importantly how do you convey these preferences to the adults in my life that are intent on introducing me to the one? and how do i make sure that my parents remain non-pressuring and supportive?

Okay if you have no idea what I'm talking about and the term biodata is foreign to you, you are definitely not Indian and don't have many Indian friends. Find one and ask them and my pondering will make more sense.

I have a feeling that this posting will lead to a few emails/comments being sent to my inbox - just as my last marriage related post did (SELL-OUT, REALIST OR DREAMER?), but please, before you jump to conclusions take a minute to look at my reality first.

The harmonium guy is back at the mandir. It all sounds much better now.

Holding on...

A movie I watched today made me think about this, the movie itself was nothing spectacular, but now 5 hours later I'm still pondering this question: Why do we hold on for so long?

Is it because we find it impossible to believe that this 'miracle' could happen again? Is it easier to hang on than admit defeat and try again? What is it about moving on that seems so horrible and scary?

I'm so great at helping people let go, but horrible at it myself. Those who can't do teach.

Maybe its just me.

Diwali Mubarak!!

Happy Diwali to all those who read this. Best wishes and may this next year bring you all that you hope for.

The house is clean, the diyas are lit and the pujas are plentiful. I can't even begin to describe how great it is to be spending a Diwali at my parents house again. Home is good.

Songs I can't get out of my head...

Dip it low, I need a hero, Dominic the Donkey, Clang clang clang went the trolley, Dare you to move, Fall to pieces, Up on the rooftop, Deepavali, I'll be loving you forever, Come as you are

Its a constant loop of mismatched music...

HELP!

Lest we forget

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.
- Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae, Canadian Army

Regardless of your feelings about war, if you live in the western world today is a day to honour those who fought for our rights to live how we choose. We're lucky that so far most of our lives have yet to be touched directly by these struggles but as more and more veterans pass on its up to the rest of us to remember.
Links: Veteran's Week, Remembrance Day

For more of my thoughts see my post from October 18

The Greatest Canadian...

Have you voted yet? Lets try to keep Don Cherry OUT of the running.

I caught a couple of episodes of this show (Terry Fox and Tommy Douglas) and think its totally wonderful. I thought it was going to be a cheesy, game show-eske show but instead I actually learned something (I think I'm beginning to see where my random facts come from). Although I agree with most of the nominations, what the hell is the deal with Don Cherry? He's currently number 3 on the list. Who's voting for him? hmmm lets see, Sir Fredrick Banting (the guy who invented insulin) vs Don Cherry OR Pierre Trudeau (the charter of rights and freedoms guy) vs Don Cherry OR Lester Pearson (flag guy, peace prize winner, CPP and CSL starter) vs Don Cherry. Again, what the deal with this whole Don Cherry thing. Okay, okay, I must admit I do like his crazy ties but am still baffled.

Anyway my challenge to all the Canadians out there is to take the time to watch it, I know its difficult to associate the CBC with something other than Hockey Night in Canada but since there is no hockey to watch we might as well turn to channel 3 and learn something this season instead.

Here's when its on:
The Greatest Canadian airs most Mondays and Wednesdays at 8 p.m. local (8:30 p.m. NT) on CBC Television, and is rebroadcast on CBC Newsworld Tuesdays and Thursdays at 8 p.m. and 11 p.m. ET, with a special encore broadcast on Saturdays. Website.

BTW. Isn't it great to see a network that highlights Newfoundland time?

The elephant show

Skinnamarinkydinkydink. Skinnamarinkydoo. I - Love - You!
Skinnamarinkydinkydink. Skinnamarinkydoo. I - Love - You!
I love you in the morning and in the afternoon.
I love you in the evening, underneath the moon.
Skinnamarinkydinkydink. Skinnamarinkydoo. I - Love - You!
Skinnamarinkydoo, I - Love - You -- Too!. (Boop, boop, ee-doo)

Our changing vocabulary

Falluja, Tikrit, Hezbollah, Hamas, Tiananmen, WMD, blitzkrieg, Abidjan, Kandahar, Darfur

All words/places that have become common place for all the wrong reasons.

A night out with the ladies...

Tonight I went out with my mom and 4 of her girlfriends. We attended a fund-raiser for the Janta Sewak Society, a local charity that supports various youth iniatives in India in the south asian community in Vancouver. Apparently this outing is an annual occurance for these 5 ladies (usually there is a 6th who's place I took). I had a really nice time, there were far more people there than I thought would come out on a Sunday night...I think at least 800 people were there. As a event it was pretty standard, great MCs, a few dances, a raffle where I didn't win anything and a good cause that makes you feel warm and fuzzy just being there.

I sat through most of the night barely saying a word (as hard as that might be to believe). In between the entertainment, I was mesmerized by these ladies. They are just like us - just 30 years older. They gossiped (in hushed voices) about who's daughter had run off and married some random white guy and about who in the community had the nerve to throw a competing fundraising gala on the same night (shame on them), they talked about their kids and updated eachother, they joked around and flirted with the young, attractive male ticket seller.

I felt a little like I had been let into a secret club, kinda like using a fake ID to get into a club and seeing it all before you are supposed to. I was one of them for the night and really liked it. Maybe getting older won't be so bad after all...

I dyed my hair black today. That interesting blue-black I've always wanted to try. I've never had hair this dark before. Blue-black hair suits me.

I think you'd like it.

Not sure what to think...

Its plain and simple - more people voted for Bush. Its not sad or tragic, its the basis of democracy. If more people had wanted Kerry, he would have won.

Watching this election has been really interesting for me. I usually follow the US election, I used to do it because I was desperately trying to understand their system but this time I was drawn to the television because I was following the election of the country that I am planning on living in, that I've chosen to live in, that I'm waiting to approve my visa to work in.

As is the case for most Canadians, I have lots of opinion of the US and of Americans, I grew up about 40km from the US border and have grown up watching US networks and shopping at US shops. But since this whole Cadbury thing I've been seeing the US with a new set of eyes, and analysing it as a home and no longer just as a neighbour. Leading up to the election I found myself torn, as I was watching last night, I was excited to learn that New Jersey is a democratic state (I had no idea), but then was saddened to realise that I'd be living in a country where most people have moral convictions that are very different than mine.

Its pretty obvious that I'm a liberal, I believe in having a strong social system (schools, health care, infrastructure, etc) and think the state is the best body to deal with these issues because they are of public interest. But I'm moving to a place that doesn't subscribe to that notion, that has significant private involvement in my "public interest". Morally, I'm rather laissez faire when it comes to other people's lives and am vehemently pro choice about most issues. I'm not sure where I'd fit in a country that isn't like me.

So now that I've committed to moving to the US, what does all this mean? In the short term, not too much. But when I start thinking about my kids and what I want them exposed to it gets all confusing again. This is probably not the last time I'll post about my internal debate on the US, hopefully next time it'll make more sense.

What's making me happy right now...

Falling asleep to the sounds of rain hitting the skylight, Succumbing to my father's military-like need for structure in the house, Crispy oblong rotis that make my family smile, Phone calls down under on weekends, Five pages of scribbled notes officially marking the start of that book I've always wanted to write, Finding that amazing new (to us) sushi place at the Quay, Laughing my ass off everytime I catch the new Ja Rule video & Finally being in the middle of a process of relocation.

(thanks for the idea Brenda via Zoe)

The best thing about Halloween...

50% off candy on November 1st, it just tastes better when its on sale :)

Ghosts, goblins and.....rings and chainsaws?

I love halloween, i love the costumes, the fireworks, but most of all I LOVE getting scared. Many of you know that I am generally gullible when it comes to story telling so I always fall for the scary stories told this time of year and ALWAYS get scared during scary movies. Thats why last night, in Hemanshu's "movie theatre", hidden under my blanket brought from home, was so fun. Oh ya..and the fireworks were great too ;)

There's are a few lessons I learned from watching Texas Chainsaw Massacre (Movie #1) yesterday:

Rule 1: Don't pick up hitchhikers (pretty standard)
Rule 2: Just smoke the damn pot (not too difficult for us BC folk)
Rule 3: As soon as you get a chance, shoot the sheriff (but don't shoot the deputy...hehehe)
Rule 4: Let your friends take one for the team and run (and I'm not talking about bars)
Rule 5: Always trust little boys with bad teeth
Rule 6: When you get away from the scary chainsaw guy and find the road...stay on the road, avoid the forest and by all means, avoid going into the slaughterhouse (okay, I know I'm getting a bit silly)

Due to my morbid fascination with true crime stories, I couldn't help but check out the claims of history made by the movie (and by some others in the room) and found out the according to multiple sources, its not true. There was no chainsaw killer. The movie (and Psycho and Hannibal Lechter's character) was inspired by a killer from Wisconsin (Ed Gain)...frightening, frightening man. Sources: Snopes, Chasingthedog

I can't wait to see all the trick or treaters tonight!!